There are all sorts of different experiences that 18-year olds have when they graduate high school. Some of them fuck their girlfriends as a pledge to stay true while they're off at separate colleges. Some get cars or SUVs. Still others might get taken to dinner or receive really nice pens. Some might get good advice.I got a speeding ticket, a copy of Oh, The Places You'll Go! and a label maker - the better to identify my things while away at college.
Apparently some people received a version of this commencement address from alumnus Patton Oswalt: from Patton's blog, May 25, 2008. I feel like my life would be 1000% different today if I had heard these words at my graduation.
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